What is kadiri?

“Kadiri” is the word that retired Bishop Teodoro Bacani used to express his disapproval of the same sex marriage ceremony held in Baguio City. The English word for kadiri is “disgusting”, from the noun “disgust: a feeling of revulsion or profound disapproval aroused by something unpleasant or offensive.”

Okay, so same-sex marriage offends and disgusts the Bishop Bacani. But does he have any moral ascendancy to publicly condemn the behavior of others?

In April 2003, Bishop Bacani’s 33-year old secretary, “Carolyn”, accused him of embracing her from behind and touching what she described as “sensitive parts of her body.” I assume she meant he grabbed her breasts and probably also her genitals without her consent.

Was that kadiri, Your Grace? If you did it with her consent would it still be kadiri?

I believe it is, either way. Because it’s disgusting for a Catholic priest, more so a bishop, to be involved in a sex scandal. Period.

But Bishop Bacani thought nothing of it. He did not even apologize to the lady he victimized.

Here’s Raissa Robles of the South China Morning Post blogging the bishop’s “apology”:

    “Monsignor Bacani initially hotly denied the accusations but later modified his statement saying he was “deeply sorry for the consequences of any inappropriate expression of affection to my secretary.”

But that was not the first time Bacani made sexual advances on his secretary, although his statement would make it appear to be the case. A similar incident happened three years earlier, when he was assigned to Caloocan City. Luckily “Carolyn” accepted his apology and said nothing more of it until he did it again.

Church officials tried to keep the second “Carolyn” incident from becoming public. Bishop Bacani’s deputy badmouthed “Carolyn” calling her “a plain looking girl who wore scanty clothes to get attention.” (If true then I wonder why Bishop Bacani kept her around for five years.) He accused the nun who accompanied Carolyn to the Papal Nuncio of trying to “mislead Church authorities”. The Nuncio promised to take prompt action if the complainant kept quiet about her experience. And other church officials including the bishop’s lay supporters tried to buy “Carolyn’s” silence.

Was the damage control kadiri, Your Grace? A truly remorseful man would have added an apology for what he and his church put the victim through after she registered her complaint. But not a word out of Bishop Bacani on that.

A report by Newsbreak after the victim’s complaint became public revealed that Bishop Bacani’s involvement in sex scandals went all the way back to the 1980s when he was a parish priest in Paco, Manila.

    “Archbishop Oscar Cruz, former president of the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of the Philippines (CBCP), conceded that he had received letters from parishioners denouncing Bacani’s alleged affairs there. Some parishioners even held a rally outside the Paco church to demand Bacani’s ouster. One detailed letter spoke of Bacani’s relationship with “MP,” their out-of-town trysts, and public display of affection that has scandalized those close to the bishop. Another letter spoke of his relationship with a former teacher in Paco. Cruz said he did not act on the letters as these were unsigned. “I don’t think the letter senders were credible.” Church insiders disclosed that while there was no formal inquiry on Bacani, the hierarchy subtly acted on the complaint. In 1996, they transferred him to Caloocan. It was in Caloocan, five years ago, where he hired Carolyn as his secretary.”

(So God brought Bishop Bacani and “Carolyn” together, in His mysterious way, as usual.)

Was your behavior in Paco kadiri or not, Your Grace?

Bishop Bacani is also blind when his fellow bishops cross the line. I don’t recall him saying kadiri in public when his fellow bishop, Crisostomo Yalung, impregnated a married woman.

There are many things that Bishop Bacani can do and has done to make this world better. But leading the charge against anything that has to do with behavior not approved by his Church is not one of those. Because it’s kadiri to see a mitered sex-offender riding on a high horse.

Manuel Buencamino

Buencamino was a weekly columnist for Today and Business Mirror. He has also written articles in other publications like Malaya, Newsbreak, "Yellow Pad" in Business World, and "Talk of the Town" in the Inquirer. He is currently with Interaksyon, the news site of TV5. MB blogged for Filipino Voices, blogs for ProPinoy and maintains a blog, Uniffors.com. Game-changers for him, as far as music goes, are Monk, Miles, Jimi, and Santana.

  • Winky

    The point on my original comment: Bacani may not have the “moral” high ground to condemn same sex marriage. He can be a mass murderer for all I care, but just like any other man, (Normal, Healthy, Young and Heterosexual) the thought of a guy having sex with another guy will always be kadiri.

    No amount of progressive training will change that.

    I understand some of you may be homosexual, and find it baffling that people find what you do at the privacy of you own homes “kadiri”, but it is what it is.

    • Bert

      What gave you the idea that some of us are homosexual? Can you read back all the comments here again and point to us the relevant quote/quotes that gave you any hint that some of us are homosexual?

      I can point to you, Winky, that some of us here is racial but no inkling some of us here are homo.

      Just to make things clear is not a bad idea, don’t you think?

    • manuelbuencamino

      Winky,

      I noticed that you keep repeating normal healthy and heterosexual. Why do you keep reaffirming it, are you doing that as a reminder to yourself? If you are then I suggest you stop fighting your nature and just go with it. The stress is turning you into a homophobe.

      Man to man, woman to woman or man and woman is okay if that’s what they enjoy. It’s nobody else’s business so don’t sweat over it.

      • Winky

        @Manuel,seeing something as “kadiri” shouldn’t be stressing anybody out. I’m surprised anybody’s sweating over what I’m saying. Homophobe? is that a new fancy progressive word, Filipinos are trying to adopt now? That’s impressive, but a couple of fancy words come to my mind first though: Time, Appointment, Garbage Can., but oh well.

        @Bert, nope I’m not saying your’e a homo. And I really don’t have any problems with anybody who is.

        • manuelbuencamino

          Winky,

          Kadiri in English is disgust.

          “disgust |disˈgəst|
          noun
          a feeling of revulsion or profound disapproval aroused by something unpleasant or offensive : the sight filled her with disgust | some of the audience walked out in disgust.

          verb [ trans. ] (often be disgusted)
          cause (someone) to feel revulsion or profound disapproval : I was disgusted with myself for causing so much misery | [as adj. ] ( disgusted) a disgusted look.”

          You don’t associate that with stress? You can be absolutely relaxed and feel kadiri at the same time?

          What do you mean “adopt”? Words are not orphans.

          • Winky

            ” You can be absolutely relaxed and feel kadiri at the same time?” –Sure, its easy.

            I see tangled power lines, garbage, retarded drivers, 5- year old kids begging in the streets of Manila, and find it all disgusting – but hey, I don’t let all of that stress me out. I figure it’s just the Philippine way of life.

            By the way, thanks for the English lesson. (Adapt)

        • Bert

          But, Winky, you’re having problem with man to man but not with girl to girl if the girls are fairly attractive though you also have problem with girl to girl if one of the girls is black, what gives? I know curiosity kills the cat but that’s better than being kept hanging all your life.

  • Winky

    Ok true, Bacani does not have the “moral” high ground to condemn same sex marriage. But just like any other man, the thought of a guy having sex with another guy would always be “kadiri”. There is just no way around it.

    • manuelbuencamino

      winky,

      how about girl to girl, would the man in you find that kadiri also?

      • Winky

        If the girls are fairly attractive, of course not.

        • manuelbuencamino

          so man to man is kadiri but girl to girl if fairly attractive is ok. there you have it same sex relationship is kadiri based on your personal preference. Could that be true of Bacani also.

          • Winky

            Geez, my personal preference? so your saying the thought of a guy having sex with another guy, is not kadiri to you? I am a normal, healthy, heterosexual man, and to me and everybody else like me, guy on guy action will always be kadiri. what’s the big deal?

          • manuelbuencamino

            Actually I don’t spend any time thinking about man to man sex. Although I must admit that girl to girl sex does cross my normal, healthy, heterosexual mind.

            How about you, do you think about man to man sex a lot, in your own normal, healthy heterosexual way?

    • UP nn grad

      Winky is girl-name, right?

      • Bert

        Winky can be either boy or girl. But Pinky is a girl, though I think that Kinky is both boys and girls.

        I’m just wondering why Winky thinks it’s not kadiri if the girls are fairly attractive and kadiri if the girls are not attractive. Is the term kadiri refers to the physical image of a person?

        Does Winky thinks that man-to-man sex not kadiri too if the men are fairly attractive?

        Am I seeing a gender bias here?

        • Winky

          “Is the term kadiri refers to the physical image of a person?” — Physical Image and Gender

          Angelina Jolie and Jenifer Aniston = Sure
          Oprah Winfrey and Rosie O’donnell = Nah
          Two male actors = Nope

          “Am I seeing a gender bias here?” – Sure

          • UP nn grad

            A more compelling question is this, winky. Is it thuggery (therefore, jail-time) or is upholding morality (therefore, applause) when you or one of your friends kick and hit with baseball bats two guys “doing it”?

          • UP nn grad

            plus… there are members of the Malacanang circle of people who are LGBT and, one would imagine, would want same-sex marriage.

            Is Presi-Noynoy to be condemned (Kadiri is a rot on the moral fiber!!!) or is presi-Noynoy to be applauded for leaving-alone-what-they-do-in-their-bedrooms when he talks to his staff?

          • Winky

            @UPn, wow.. Just because I find it “kadiri” for two guys to “do it”, that doesn’t mean I would condone thuggery.

          • Bert

            Ah, Winky, you hate black people, don’t you? Are you white? It’s clear you have discriminating taste in your sexual fantasy preference, and color and probably race too aside from physical image and gender are some of your kadiri. Nothing to do with being heterosexual or bisexual, don’t you think?

          • Winky

            “Discriminating taste in sexual fantasy preference” – Ok sure.

            (Rosie’s white by the way)

          • Bert

            Oh, that confirmed it then. That’s because Oprah is black. So, aside from color and race, you also favors segregation. Aren’t those things passe already?

          • manuelbuencamino

            Winky,

            Now that you mentioned Ophra. Do you think it’s kadiri if she did it with Dr. Phil?

          • manuelbuencamino

            Winky,

            What about Oprah and Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Aniston, is that kadiri?

        • manuelbuencamino

          But can you picture a woman walking around unaware that metallic objects attached themselves to her clothes?

          It puts a whole new meaning to the term “magnetic personality”.

          • manuelbuencamino

            oops that was for the bello post